Give Thanks Well

“We’re talkin’ ’bout please and thank you
They’re called the magic words
If animals could talk,
You’d hear the fishes and the birds
Saying please and thank you,
‘Cause they’re the magic words”(an original song from the Barney show)

We were taught early in life the importance of saying please and thank you, and of having good manners, everything from using those words, to no elbows on the table, to being respectful to elders and so many other things. There are cultural and ethnic nuances to manners that vary widely throughout the world. I am one of those who believe that good manners, in any culture, are important. It is sometimes a trend that I see slipping away as the world, communication and socialization changes. The basics found in good manners are often what help to start a relationship; they indicate to the other person: “I see you” and “You have value”.

While good manners are important, having the right heart is even more important. Good manners are the actions that are seen, but they must come from a genuine heart of care, otherwise, manners are simply a superficial action. Most importantly, we are to have a thankful heart, “an attitude of gratitude”, especially in relationship with our God. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18: ^“16Rejoice always; ¹⁷pray without ceasing; ¹⁸in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”  Really?  In everything? But what about when that fool cut me off? In everything… But what about when my kids refuse to come to church? In everything… But what about when I the doctors gave me the news? In everything…

Notice that verse 18 says: “in everything…” not “for everything…”. That little word makes a world of difference. It is God’s will for us that we maintain a grateful heart despite and in the midst of difficult circumstances. “For everything” would mean that we had to be thankful for all the bad things that happen. I have a hard time buying into that thinking, especially when I take into account that our adversary comes only to steal, kill and destroy, and is the driving force behind many of these bad things. I am not thankful to or for him at all! We can be thankful for the character traits that grow out of living through difficult circumstances, such as perseverance, patience, faith (also known as the fruit of the Spirit); we can be thankful for the peace that passes understanding that God provides in every situation; we can be thankful that Jesus Christ is right there with us through it all, because He has already been through it all. Gratitude involves taking our eyes off the circumstances and putting them on our Savior; those negative circumstances will lose their influence over our thoughts and hearts as we focus on Christ. God wants us to have a grateful heart so that He can  help us through difficult circumstances.

Cultivating an attitude of gratitude takes concentrated effort and practice. It is not something that comes naturally to us humans. We tend towards selfishness; the world pushes us in that direction and Satan is invested in having us nurture selfishness because we are stronger when we walk united in our faith than when we walk alone. It is a constant and conscious process to set aside our own selfish desires and intents, and instead think first about God, and secondly about others. How often, when we go before the throne of God, do we go there because we want or need something, instead of just going to Him because we love Him and think He is awesome? Or how often do we forget to notice what He has done, and instead launch into what is lacking? Carrying an attitude of gratitude demands that we first go to God with a thankful heart just because He is, that someone of His omnipotence would even look at us, let alone call us His children. Lauren Daigle sings a beautiful song, First, (written by Jason Ingram, Mia Fieldes, Paul Mabury, Hank Bentley and Lauren Daigle) that starts out:

“Before I bring my need

I will bring my heart

Before I lift my cares

I will lift my arms”

Before you bring your plea, make sure you bow your knee. Before you ask Him, praise Him. He so deserves our praise and our gratitude!

Carrying an attitude of gratitude means doing whatever is asked of us without “fussing and mussing” (one of my mother’s “mom-isms”) about it. Philippians 2:14-16 “¹⁴Do all things without grumbling or disputing; ¹⁵so that you will prove yourselves to be blameless and innocent, children of God above reproach in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you appear as lights in the world, ¹⁶holding fast the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I will have reason to glory because I did not run in vain nor toil in vain.” This also is not something that comes easily to us humans. Let’s face it, we often like to grumble, and we can usually find someone who likes to grumble right there alongside us! When we engage without complaints, the light of Christ shines through us, and sets us apart from the darkness in the world.; verse 15 tells us that we become (prove yourselves) free from fault (blameless) and not mixed with evil (innocent). If that is true, then the opposite must also hold true: complaints leave us open to blame, and leave the door open for evil to walk in. Well…that’s a different take on grumbling and disputing! Think back to the stories of the children of Israel in the Old Testament: they were always complaining about something. The result was that they turned away from their God and worshipped idols, and had all kinds of bad things happen to them. Their response is a great example to us of what not to do if we want to have an attitude of gratitude, stay in fellowship with God and enjoy the blessings of that fellowship. Our ability to carry an attitude of gratitude, and not complain, becomes a witness of the grace of God in our lives, the light that shines in the darkness.

Giving thanks well involves having a consistent attitude of gratitude towards our God in all situations, being willing to submit without grumbling and arguing, and keeping our hearts in the right place. And if we can display good manners towards others, we can also display them towards Him: say “good morning” to your Lord every day, approach Him with respect, and always thank Him for every good and perfect gift that He has given and will give. Reflect His light in your attitude of gratitude for all the world to see. God bless you!